Depression Hobby

Everytime i get depressed or something bad happens that greatly affects me, i would just watch some funeral videos from Romania or Moldova and just imagines that i am the person inside that coffin wearing a business attire, holding the crucifix with an icon of Isus Hristos or the Bogorodice or any patron saint, the trisagion verse on a paper on my forehead and i am draped with flowers, letters of remembrance from anyone and the blanket my lower body would be crimson with the image depicting Sveti Sava establishing the Srpska Pravoslavna Crkva for the Srpski zemlje. Would i even get that funeral one day? I just want people to remember me and my alone but not alone mentality and never say die attitude.

Here are examples of the Youtube Clips i had watched since November 2013.

http://youtu.be/JBCBu_JJKAI

The girl named Brandusa, a 13 year old Romanian that hanged herself because of being rejected by the guy who is six years ahead of her.

http://youtu.be/-YJ5lMy_MP8

The guy named Serghei Virlan, a Moldovan who died in car accident during the winter. Note that the blanket his body was draped with the baptism of Christ and the letters written in Moldovan Cyrillic.

http://youtu.be/sa4Y9LHZRWw

Angelica Cristea. I never knew how she died but this could be a typical Romanian funeral wake. A group of musicians performing songs of sadness but i don't get it why they sing like drunkards or they never got tired of singing also folk songs. And the highlight was the body of the girl got almost indignified when people argue where she should be placed in the room.