Being childish is fine

Growing up in a kind of strict and conservative family, i was looking for my own in this world. I am innocent minded and desires for what is right. It is just people misunderstood my views as nothing to this ever-changing world. But when you see my heart, i mean it. No pun intended but what i really want for this world.

You could ask me why i dont cheat or find another girl even if the girl is far away. Or, make myself what others don't like. Or even become emotional when i see this thing whether dad or mom or from my family gave me. Yes, dad and i have some recent stupidity acts but i value some things he gave me because it came from his hands and not from others. Or even if i want to have a diet, mom would certainly disagree. Ohh, i would get fatter and my girl would not like me.

If there was no internet, i would write on my diary(if i am independent). When i see dogs outside with their Japanese owners, i wish i could have one with my future family one day. I love dogs even if it is this Japanese word "mendokusai" i am hearing from everyone when they are working too much for small things. Just being innocent. 

I am always talking about nonsense things but here is one thing. I don't complain about what others want to talk about because i am a team player. And i want my workmates to be united no matter what.

Or when it comes to love, when i mean it, i will do it. If my futute wife would see this article, all i want to say to her now is that, i love you and your the woman i will be living with for the rest of my life. That is from my heart and not from my mind. Again, i am innocently speaking and childish but it is what i want for her. My heart and desire to be with her is stronger than what maturity can lead me into. Maturity is needed but most people doesn't use it properly.

I hope i am clear that, childish and innocent thinking is still a part of everyone.

Breaking my silence about my preferred styles

This is for the record. I may look like a woman and miscellaneous people call me either gay and tomboy for no reason but my girly face. What they don't know is deep inside, i am born a man and will die a man. It is just i was born with a woman's face despite my facial hair and 90% body as a man. To be frank, i am tired of hearing from people that i am gay or i want a guy.

Of course, i want to have a wife someday that can accept my life as well too because marriage is both parties functioning as one and not separately. I tend to have a heartbreaking courtship of women when they wouldn't want to be my girlfriend or eventually, future wife.

Here are the factors why i look like a girl. It could be that through my Japanese and Spanish bloods running through my Filipino roots, it blended too much that instead of a manly one, it turned into a cute combination of a cute Japanese man and an aggressive Spanish woman. Or, when my mom taught me to use Ponds cream because when i was in high school, i have too many pimples or blackheads appearing everywhere because of the pollution level in Manila. Since then, i am using Ponds whenever i have or now in Japan, to combat the effects of winter drying.

So now, would everyone of you believe me now that i am not gay and i am a true man? If not, ask me directly and be enlightened enough. If you want to compare my pictures, here it is for viewing only.

December 2013

Febuary 2014

When i played basketball last April 2014

Me, riding a bike

One of my cutest pose

Feeling like singing the Bože Pravde

Marriage is sacred

Wedding is a joyous day in every companionship life. What is in stored there is for the future. Loving each other, having babies, working together for the success of their offspring and much more, their lifetime contract to God which means till death do as apart.

During my past entries about my ideal wedding, i described my ideal future wedding as an Orthodox Christian one. Although for now, it is just a dream.

What i don't like about the situation in this modernized world is that, many people think too much of money and tend to forget the true meaning of a good  marriage. There are some questions raised as well like, "is he/she the one?" or "is he/she rich?" or this and that. What kind of mentality are those? For me, i wouldn't mind if she is rich or poor as long as she is the woman i want to love and love with through pain and joys. 

Some weddings are shotguns as well or just because of VISA or just because of any stupid reason i knew ever since i was a kid! Hasn't they learned the true essence or they just weren't educated enough at home?

If someone would ask me about wedding, it is my forever or lifetime contract to God. It is not meant to be broken or a subject to divorce but, of true Christian family through pains and joys, hardships and success, trials and wins. It is not a man made part of our life secularly but spirituality. And i will tell him/her that, only scared/opportunistic people divorce for another person. My views on wedding actually differs from my dad but i know what good things are and those who seize the opportunity to make pleasures of themselves.

Whether your a Christian or a Muslim or Jew or any religion it doesn't matter as long as you have the good ideals and sacred heart to fulfill your wedding vows because God will be the only one who will know that you value your marriage enough to be called a good father or mother.