How far your faith can lead you?

I am continuing to raise questions to awaken everyone. Whether they are of this faith or not. Of course, it is better to ask than to be totally ignorant. I maybe waiting for that day because of some circumstances i had but one thing is for sure, i will convert and this is what God gave me. The power to choose my faith because i know God will lead me into that promised day.

If some people might wonder why i am still showing how i loved God and my Christian faith, i am even if very few people saw it. It is through the Orthodox church that i prayed again and valued my faith so much. Maybe, God sent me those knowledge and by heart through my history and religious books.

There is a thing also. You can't have neither faith by heart and faith by knowledge. It is like denying the other existence or it is like, denying God's man and divine persona or denying either one of the Holy spirit. That's from my heart and not from what other people would say.

It is easy to be Catholic or Protestant this new era but when i get baptized to Orthodoxy, it could mean new adoptations and new learnings but i am on that situation a lot of times and God will guide me through it all. I don't waste opportunities just because of time period i must wait for that day. I don't even believe in this typical Filipino phrase:"you born a Catholic, die a Catholic." Because if your faith is not really for you and God has plan for your true faith, then it shall be.

I am not scared to take the risks of converting and being rejected by my family members in the future because i know it could hurt at first but, time will heal and because of that healing, no more pain will be felt.

For the Future-Za Budućnosti-未来ために

What does the word future to each and everyone of us? Me, a lot. My dreams, my future family, my everything. I need to start realizing that dream or it will lose all of a sudden. My biggest failures now is just one fingertip away, far from success. But it doesn't mean i will shy away from risks of my own from some things i need. Someone will be that last ingredient if i have too. I am somehow naive but hungry for that dream because i failed a lot during my past years.

How about a future that i depend on my parents but i lack freedom to do what i need to do? Or i am devoid of my parents or family members but i would be accomplishing a much greater dream? Like in business, addition by subtraction?

Or, the future desired by the children of wars raging through the years or by lucky ones that have money and the brains but lack that freedom necessary to fulfill what they truly desire. It makes me feel sorry for those who were born in poor conditions but there is one saying, the future is bright for those who will fight for it. Now, i am fighting for the future i desire, it is just i am suppressed but once i am set free, i would take opportunity. Ok, i admit i am an opportunist but it is not that i wanted it, but because i need it.

You can control destiny because anything is possible since nothing is impossible. I may have to write this for people to realize that dream or else, they would be swallowed by others' insincerity.

Only God can judge me

Isus Hristos, uštedeti mene!

As my life is becoming more of a crossroads, i only pray at night but secretly. Dad knows something even if i don't want to tell him and everyone in my family. Despite the chaos ahead, i will make sure one thing. God can judge me but no human can.

It is an open secret that i am hiding my faith. I am silent as of now because in my current workplace, i am with mom and her colleagues. I am having a hard time integrating myself to them because i am not close to mom as of these days or to dad or to my other older sister. I would rather have spend time to close friends that know who i am truly, whether i am silent or a lively and goofy guy, trying to keep everyone united or at least, awake.

I always think of someone as of now. She is one year ahead of me but i don't know if i can enter her heart. I think i would not succeed but i wished to be with her as of late. She's my inspiration and God knows when i fall in love, i get too emotional. Emotional because i haven't controlled my emotions yet. If she will give my heart to me, i will give her true love much better than what i could do on others who left me.

Most people think i am GAY. Why? My fellow Filipinos see my Japanese style fashion as gay for them. For them, a Filipino guy should be clean cut, loose outfit and macho body. I don't have a macho body but what i can be at least proud of is that i have a girlish face, suited for my innocent heart with matching Japanese pretty boy outfits like red skinny jeans or black long vest and an earring on my left ear.

No matter what, only God can see my heart. And when i show who i am, it is he who would truly judge me. Not judge mental people or some stupid critic of my fashion sense. God knows how hungry i am to work hard for my future, my future orthodox Christian faith and, my future wife. +++

I want to feel Vidovdan festivities in the future

I won't keep this a secret. I want to celebrate Vidovdan or St. Vitus's day. But to Serbs, both spiritual and national day of celebration for it symbolizes the martyrdom of Saint Prince Lazar in the battle of Kosovo and thousands of Serbs for protecting Kosovo and Serbia from waves of Turkish invasions. Not to mention some events that occured on the same date.

• on June 28, 1389, according to the Serbian Orthodox religious tradition, and the Serbian romantic (19th century) national identity founding myth, the Ottoman Empire defeats Serbia in the Battle of Kosovo with Prince Lazar slain in battle. Ottoman Sultan Murad I is killed by Serbian knight Miloš Obilić on that day.
• on June 28, 1881, a secret treaty between Austria-Hungary and Serbia is signed with Serbia earning the right to be recognized as a monarchy in exchange of surrendering its independence to the Habsburg Empire.
• on June 28, 1914 the assassination by Gavrilo Princip of the Austro-Hungarian crown prince, Franz Ferdinand, triggers the First World War.
• on June 28, 1919, the Treaty of Versailles is signed ending World War I.
• on June 28, 1921, the Serbian King Alexander I proclaims the new Constitution of the Kingdom of Serbs, Croats and Slovenes, known thereafter as the Vidovdan Constitution (Vidovdanski ustav).
• on June 28, 1948, the Cominform publishes, on the initiative of its Soviet delegates Zhdanov, Malenkov and Suslov, in a "Resolution on the State of the Communist Party of Yugoslavia" their condemnation of the Yugoslavian communist leaders - this event is seen as the turning point that marks the final split between Stalin's Soviet Union and Tito's Yugoslavia.
• on June 28, 1989, on the 600th anniversary of the battle of Kosovo, Serbian leader Slobodan Milošević delivers the Gazimestan speech on the site of the historic battle.
• on June 28, 1990, an amendment is brought to the Constitution of Croatia changing the status of Serbs from constituent people (konstitutivni narod) of the Croatian nation to national minority.
• on June 28, 2001, Slobodan Milošević is deported to the ICTY to stand trial.
• on June 28, 2006, Montenegro is announced as the 192nd member state of the United Nations.
• on June 28, 2008 takes place the inaugural meeting of the Community Assembly of Kosovo and Metohija

Positives or negatives, it is an important day for Serbs. For me, i think that it represents the sacrifices and the consequences of Serbia as the Gatekeepers of Europe not just against Turkish but American, NATO, Roman Catholic and imperialist waves of invasion. It is important to say that, it represents what the Serbs will make for their future. May the Serbian people be blessed with a much better future than now.

Srpska žena Lepa i slatka :)

It's an open secret i like Serbian women. They are beautiful, strong, nationalistic and religious deep inside like their Greek counterparts. I don't know much aside from asking my facebook peers in Srbija about these women. I hoped to meet one and eventually, marry her if it is God's will. It is because i admire women who are that nationalistic and strong. Serbian women also mystifies me a lot, especially someone who sends some goodnight kisses(i am a bit shy) and wishes me well often.

When a friend of mine suggested that he could introduce me to some girls there, i know there is still hope i can marry someone from this beautiful and resilient country. Maybe, she can teach me Srpski more, bring me closer to God and the traditions of Srbija both religious and social life.

I don't know more but i wish to get closer to their traditions and culture since i have a Srpski heart more and more. Although i still have a Filipino heart and a Japanese outside appearance, it will be easy for me to learn the Srpski way of life than anyone. Maybe this is what is in cased for me.

Hope my wishes come true at least.

I admire also Greek women, Georgian, Romanian and Russian women. One faith through different traditions and a strong national identity. Which i want to instill on my future children who will bear the names of the saints i will name them. Hope everyone would know that, in any 99% uncertainty, there is that 1% that is still valuable.